…Wanted—several (large) cash-counting machines…and a guide to repelling begging letters…#TBSU…

…I know lots of you Lads and Lassies from Planet Scribbler will be like me…far too busy to keep pace with normal correspondence that ordinary people have to attend to…but evr’y now and then I take time to catch up with some regular paperwork and bills maintenance…this morning has been spent poring over what has become an avalanche of incoming monies…it seems that some benign Father-y Christmas-sy figure has been popping my name into  the ‘send’ boxes of tons of people who just wanna give me piles of money…I’m humbled by the range of personnel…kind ladies, some of them recently widowed spouses of Nigerian generals…others, insiders in some unrecognisable government treasury departments in countries I never knew existed…a smattering of (obviously) high-level bank executives with access to unclaimed funds in forgotten accounts…lottery winners who’ve discovered a way to bend their local tax regulations…there’s some Eastern European-sounding dudes with more consonants in their names than a whole village of Polish families…at the last count, before my desk calc’later ran out of 00000000000000000’s space, I’m now worth more than God and Donald Trump put together…now I can have gold bars lining my candle-lit writer’s garret..maybe buy up some of the large publishing houses, and sack all the bosses (revenge can be SO sweet)…and ALL I had to do was give these nice people my exact bank account details,and, and, and …excuse me a moment, I think I hear police car sirens outside and a loud knocking at the ward door…wonder who they’re after, Matron…this may take a little while…

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Enjoy, share around as usual to your blogging buddies.. cheers


Filed under Blether, Scribbling & Stuff

4 responses to “…Wanted—several (large) cash-counting machines…and a guide to repelling begging letters…#TBSU…

  1. I can always count on you for a chuckle Seumas. Thanks, enjoyed the post!


  2. robitille

    Oooh! We must know the same people, Seumas… Well, that and I apparently play the lottery in Spain, Portugal, and Brazil and have quite certainly won scads and scads. And, probably due to the fact that Ed McMahon went to one of my high schools (you’d be amazed at what an ‘in’ that can be!), I may have already won $1,000 a day for life… While that’s certainly not up to par with Barrister Whosis’s anticipated deposits into my accounts, it’ll be nice walking-around-with money. *grin* Do you ever want to email those people back just to ask “D’ya think I fell off the turnip truck yesterday?”


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