Monthly Archives: March 2014

…no greater LUV can Authors show… than excellent reviews for a fellow scribbler…#TBSU…

… it’s prob’ly okay occasionally to show some nice things that other good people are sayin’ about yeez… I launched SELF-PUBLISHING STEPS TO SUCCESSFUL SALES on Amazon Kindle a coupla days ago, and already two absolute gems of authors have written priceless reviews for it… I’ll try to stop blushing enuff to print them here, with no apologies nor stoopid false modesty… LUVVIN IT!


…this from J.T Patten

Best Indie Guide to Self-Publishing Marketing and Sales, March 29, 2014

This review is from: Self-Publishing Steps To Successful Sales (Kindle Edition)

Seumas Gallacher is a well-known authority in the indie social media circles, in addition to his thriller novels.

He has written one of the most concise step by step guides to self-publishing sales success that I have ever read. And I have read a lot. I wish that I had read this a year ago.

Gallacher walks the reader in a thoughtful manner through the stages of campaigns that are essential to publishing and branding. He hits on the core survival programs such as Kindle, WordPress blogging, Twitter (and tweet management tools), Facebook, LinkedIn, Goodreads, etc.

As a successful self-publisher, blogger, and tweeter, Seumas practices what he preaches and has been acknowledged for doing so through his uptake and followership.

The guide is an inexpensive no-brainer manual for going out into the world for newbies. Loved it!


…and from Ms Maryalice Tomoeda

5-stars/ If you want to self-publish, you need to read this! March 30, 2014

By Maryalice Tomoeda
Amazon Verified Purchase

His blog has a gazillion followers and his self published crime thrillers have well over 70,000 downloads, so Mr. Gallacher certainly knows how to not only write, but also how to catch the fickle winds of the reading market. But the question is, can he teach? The answer is a resounding YES. It’s a rare person that can do both, but Mr. Gallacher nails it on the head. He takes you through everything step by step, and never, as some how-to books are wont to do, assumes you are already a master of the subject. He lays it out in an easy to read fashion… For instance, I am not a math whiz…I hate math and the thought of budgeting spreadsheets make me want to run gibbering from the room in horror. But even the lessons on budgeting were so understandable that I think I could actually take a swing at this. If you have any desire to take the story in your head and put it out for people to buy and read, this is the self-publishing guide for you. I highly recommend it!




…now I’ll have to go and lie down in a darkened room for a while… see yeez later… LUV YEEZ


Filed under Blether, Scribbling & Stuff

… GOB-SMACKED’s the only WURD for it!… first-day launch heights for a wee guide book on Self-Publishing…#TBSU…


…surprised!… astonished!… blown away!… didn’t expect that!… no, Mabel… GOB-SMACKED’s the only WURD for it!… yeez spend five years hard labour producing yer crime thriller masterpieces… yeez throw them onto the Great God Amazon Kindle amidst a raft of prayer, invocation and fervent hope that yeez’ll sell a few at least to cover the cost of the candles in the garret… and, if yeez are a bit lucky… no, re-phrase that… if yeez are a lot lucky… yeez start to see some squiggles on yer Amazon Sales pages… and then, if yeez are incredibly lucky, yeez see yer wee babies climb into the upper levels of the Amazon sales rankings… imagine, therefore, the pink cloud this ol’ Jurassic’s currently floating on this morning… yesterday was the launch of my latest off’ring, Self-Publishing Steps To Successful Sales… my account of how it all WURKED for me so far on this dizzy eBook pan-marathon… intended to help my scribbling siblings, Lads and Lassies of Blog Land, to enjoy sum’thing sim’lar… there was no great fanfare of banging it on to the usual suspects websites, clamouring for air space… only advising my pals through the blog and some Tweets… and the response has been magnificent! …lookee here at this morning’s Amazons’ (plural) rankings :

#22 in Books > Reference > Writing > Writing Skills
#26 in Kindle Store > Books > Education & Reference > Writing (USA)

#35 in Kindle Store > Kindle eBooks > Education & Reference > Writing, Research & Publishing Guides > Writing Skills
#95 in Books > Education & Reference > Writing, Research & Publishing Guides > Writing > Writing Skills (Germany)

Nr. 13 in Kindle-Shop > eBooks > Fremdsprachige eBooks > Englische eBooks > Lernen & Nachschlagen > Schreiben > Besser schreiben
Nr. 39 in Englische Bücher > Lernen & Nachschlagen > Schreiben > Besser schreiben

If yeez want a look, jump in:



…see yeez later, I’m quite dizzy with all of this, think I’ll go lie down for a while …LUV YEEZ…


Filed under Blether, Scribbling & Stuff

…my new wee baby’s launched on Kindle today!… ‘Self-Publishing Steps to Successful Sales’… #TBSU…



…this ol’ Jurassic’s blessed with having so many great, truly supportive pals amongst yeez Lads and Lassies of Blog Land… I mentioned a wee while back I wanted to compile the various bits and pieces which have gone together toward my Magical Mystery Tour on the eBook circuit… how an old f*rt like this can clamber aboard the Amazon Kindle train-ride to Literary Valhalla, with less than zero knowledge of how the Internet really WURKS… and amass 75,000+ sales/downloads for my books… I think it prob’ly best I don’t understand it all… that way I can focus just on what WURKED for me… a few years ago, when I flagged down the indie self-publishing taxi, I had no idea where it was gonna take me… by great good fortune (and luck does play a big part in publishing, for sure) early in the journey, I read how the excellent newbie author, Rachel Abbott, whose first novel had 100,000 sales, treated the entire writing spectrum as a business… sum’thing in that clicked for me, and has remained my mantra ever since… ‘Self-Publishing Steps To Successful Sales’ charts my approach all the way along the route, and is constant today… many, many authors and friends have asked me that simple question, ‘How did you do it?’… this is simply how it served me…I hope it helps others of yeez who are part of this wunnerful global quill-scrapers universe… ‘Self-Publishing Steps To Successful Sales’ doesn’t pretend to be an exhaustive tome on every nuance of the eBook and self-publishing arenas… I stick with K.I.S.S!…. Keep It Simple Stoopid!… and they don’t come much more Stoopid than me with this computer stuff… the message should be clear… if the bumbling Master Gallacher can do it, emb’dy can do it…I hope yeez enjoy the read… (after which a review or twelve would be most welcome)… see yeez later… I’ve got a new wee baby to go and pimp! … LUV YEEZ

Amazon links for ‘Self-Publishing Steps To Successful Sales’






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…once upon a time… in an Irish bar in Noo Yawk City… #TBSU…

…it’s been more than thirty years since this ol’ Jurassic called a halt in his unequal tilt with booze… let the record show I surrendered only after a gallant twenty-year campaign to drink the WURLD dry… I used to say regularly, ‘…I’m not as think as people drunk I am…’ …I still pour drink measures at home for other people the way I used to take it, and wonder why they keep falling off their seats… bluudy amateurs!… the jousting with the electric soup wasn’t always a happy engagement, but there were occasions with its involvement of truly memorable delight… it was February 1982, on a week when Noo Yawk City experienced one of its coldest ever spells… back then it wasn’t called ‘Polar Vortex’… it was just ‘winter weather’… on a pass-through business visit to the Big Apple, a pal of mine, (a Consul-General no less from a country which I shall not name, in order to protect the guilty) and I ended up in a place called the Green Derby Bar on a Saturday night… despite my name, I’m actually Scottish (yeez might have noticed that before), but the ‘Gallacher’ traces back to the Ould Country… the clientele in the Green Derby was unmistakably Irish to a shamrock… a splash or twelve of strong waters was taken as the party warmed up… back then, I used to sing a bit in Gaelic, (the Scottish version, Isle of Mull, Tobermory), and it didn’t take long until the other Bhoys got wind of this and tempted  me into rendering ‘Danny Boy’ in Gaelic (didn’t take much arm-twisting, it must be said)… the instant devotion that drunks seem to spawn for other drunks in song was great fun… now here’s the thing… they had a bar raffle for a bottle of Jameson’s Irish Whiskey (what else?)… most of the customers bought tickets, scribbled the names on the reverse and into the raffle jug they went… the draw took place round about slurring time… and the name on the winning tab was… Seumas Gallacher!… great acclamation went up… the cap was thrown away and the bottle passed around the company (no glasses required, thank you, Mabel)… then I discovered… every raffle ticket had my name on it! … dontcha just LUV the Irish! … slainte!… see yeez later… LUV YEEZ




Filed under Blether, Scribbling & Stuff

…Author Christoph Fischer interviews yours truly … #TBSU…

Author pal, Christoph Fischer has really  pushed the boat out for this ol’ Jurassic recently with two book reviews and now a great fun interview… many thanks, that man.. I promise to pay for the damages..promise…

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Author Interview—Seumas Gallacher

I am finally catching up with one of the great indie thriller writers. I reviewed two of his marvellous books recently, The Violin Man’s Legacy and Vengeance Wears Black.

Today I have the pleasure of an interview with the author.

Tell us a little about yourself as a writer and as a person.

Born in the Govan Docklands in Glasgow in the same street as the former Manchester United manager, Sir Alex Ferguson. He’s older than me by a handful of years, has much more money, but I’m better looking than he is. I have an IQ that apparently lets me solve the problems of the Universe, but I can’t switch a laptop on without the risk of it exploding. Wandered through the maze of international banking (shssh, whisper that) for forty years before escaping into the world of quill-scraping. LUVVIN IT!

Tell us about your writing history. When was the first time you decided to write and when was the first time you did?

Scribbled teenaged angst-ridden poetry and dabbled in short story fiction many years ago. Discovered ‘that book’ we all supposedly have in us about five years ago, and enjoying it so much now, I don’t wanna stop.

Tell us about your first book? How did you decide on the characters, plots and title?

‘The Violin Man’s Legacy’, the first book in what has now developed into the Jack Calder crime thriller series is about a trio of former SAS officers who set up their own security firm to engage in protection of high value goods and personnel. In the course of their business, they encounter international crime lords of sundry hue. Not being bound by the normal terms of engagement, they deploy their extensive black operations skills in countering the bad guys.
The idea for the stories was born in the Far East where at one point I was doing a ‘turnaround’ project for a stricken ferry company. I was obliged to fire trade union workers, policemen and local mayors in some places. That called for the need of an armoured car and armed bodyguards who were trained by a former SAS officer, who became a pal. The characters, plot and title were developed in a ten-day period when I walked twelve kilometres every evening, just thinking about how the book should be shaped.

Did anyone influence you / encourage you to become a writer?

I think a writer’s entire life and experience influences his/her work. As for other authors, see the question below about them.

When did you decide to write in this genre?

I’m attracted to any kind of good writing, but crime fiction seemed the easier route to begin with as a newbie scribbler.

Who would you hope plays the characters in a movie version?

Any of the usual suspects who attract audiences would be good.

Did you have it all planned out before you write your stories or do the characters and story surprise you?

Always surprises. I usually know how the ending is going to pan out, but the plot and characters hijack the laptop so often, and they drive the narrative.

Which character did you most enjoy writing?

A minor character in the first novel, a South American guy called Rico, who helped to make things happen for the main men was a heap of fun. I reluctantly had to write him out of the novel (without killing him). I think he may make an appearance again in a later book.

What would your character(s) say about you?

I’d like to think they consider me flexible in allowing them to get on with their business. I understand some of the sh*t they have to put up with.

What do you like best about writing? What’s your least favourite thing?

I absolutely enjoy every bit of the ‘business’ of writing. My regret is that I didn’t discover this gig forty years ago. No least favourite thing. The whole nine yards comes as a package deal. The writing, the proofreading, the editing, the artwork, the Kindle formatting, the promotion. You name it, I LUV IT!

Who are your favourite authors?

So many, but include Dickens, Churchill, Steinbeck, Ruark, O’Hara, Solzhenitsyn.

Who are your favourite independent writers?

Again, so many, as I try to buy at least one new author’s work per week and eventually do a review for them, as part of my way of ‘giving back’. Include John Dolan, Joe McCoubrey, Rachel Abbott, Andrew Peters, Nancy Jardine, O.G.Tomes, Mac Logan, Eric Gates, Alex Shaw… the list goes on… there are some outstanding quill-scrapers out there.

What book are you currently reading and in what format (e-book/paperback/hardcover)?

About to start eBook, ‘One Last Summer’ by Gerald Neal.

What makes you laugh?

Lots of things tickle me. My god of comedy has been Billy Connolly for forty years. Anything that borders or overshoots on irreverence is always good.

What (not who) would you like to take to a lonely island?

A television set tuned to receive all the English Premier League football matches, an endless supply of Diet Coke, and good Scottish cheese, and my laptop.

Who would you like to invite for dinner?

So many again. If they were alive, Peter Ustinov and Winston Churchill. Also the above mentioned Mister Connolly, along with Judy Dench.

Hot or cold?


Salty or sweet?


What would your friends say are your best and your oddest quality?

Hopefully they’d think me witty and loyal as best. Oddest is spouting irreverence at the most inopportune times.

What would you choose as those qualities?

I never ever give up. (Best and oddest)

How do you handle criticism of your work?

I differentiate between ‘criticism’ and ‘critique’. The former is relegated to the mental garbage can. The latter I try to take aboard.

What are you working on now?

The fourth novel in the Jack Calder series, ‘Killer City’. I’m also currently considering publishing my thoughts, guidance and experience about this gig of self-publishing via Kindle and the proper use of the social networks to ‘build the platform’.

Is there anything you would like us to know about yourself and your books?

Just that I hope people get as much pleasure out of reading them as I do creating them. And many thanks, Christoph, for giving me room on this superb blog.

Blog :
Twitter : @seumasgallacher
Facebook :
Email :



Amazon Links for SAVAGE PAYBACK
Aus :


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…how to reach an Author’s REAL G-spot… settle down at the back, there… this is clean… #TBSU…

…this ol’ Jurassic’s prattled on many times about the strange dichotomy of a quill-scraper’s existence… on the one hand, the isolation in yer own head, trying to make sense of yer plot lines and getting yer characters to behave themselves by following what yeez had in mind for them… the endless succession of sleepless nights with dialogue rattling around in yer wee grey cells… nobody to share it with… agonising over single WURDS or phrasing to ‘get it right, Mabel’… we’ve all been there… then the flip-side… the wunnerful global scribblers family interaction on the Web… the unbridled generosity of spirit teeming in from eLinked fellow scrivening sloggers… friendships far stronger and more positive than many of yeez’ve ever experienced with face-to-face relationships… a mutual respect develops with all manner of prose purveyors… poets, playwrights, journalists, novelists, historians and academics… oh, sure, I also have tons of SOSYAL NETWURKIN contacts acquired over the past few years, but I like to think I try to find quality as well as quantity in their ranks… and so it has proved, time and time again…those of yeez who follow this blog regularly (and thank yeez for that!) will know I try to encourage support of other authors as much as possible… a ReTweet here, a Facebook share there, a mention on Goodreads, a book review on the Amazon Kindle pages… goodness knows, we can all do with a helping hand occasionally… the other day, one of my virtual friends, an author for whom I have enormous respect, paid me the highest compliment I could ever wish for… in an almost throwaway line, she wrote … ‘…I love your work…’ …four simple WURDS, Lads and Lassies of Blog Land, but those of yeez who immerse yerselves in this business will appreciate just how much it touches the very core of a writer… how to reach an Author’s real G-spot… tell him or her yeez LUV their WURK… see yeez later… LUV YEEZ

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Filed under Blether, Scribbling & Stuff

…as a crime thriller scribbler yeez have to do some fieldWURK research occasionally, right?… #TBSU…

…the following account of yesterday’s activity may or may not have actually happened… as a dealer in fiction, with tinges of fact thrown in to baffle yeez, I could tell yeez if it’s true or not… but then, I’d have to kill yeez… yeez know how that WURKS, right?… the cryptic message came through early in the morning in the usual code… the cornflake cereal packet was empty… stocks in the breakfast larder were depleted… no eggs, minimal bacon, sausages gone… an urgent mission to replenish stocks was on the cards… my direct telephone line call to Chief of Security was succinct… ‘…we have RED ALERT, repeat, RED ALERT… mobilise the assets… we’re heading for Tesco’s supermarket’… in minutes, the usual phalanx of bodyguards arrived at the front door… the extra bulges at the left jacket-lapels signalled they were all carrying heat… yeez can’t take any chances at Tesco… the armoured limousine, flanked by two identical vehicles, blackened-glass windows, (decoys against potential assassins) screeched away from the house… the professional minders swung into the carpark, and jumped from the cars before they’d stopped… the checking routine covered all possible avenues of attack threats… a quartet of hulks spoke into their wrists… all clear!… good to go!… get him inside!… now!… in an instant I was whisked into the store… the ring of muted aggression cleared a pathway to the grocery section… I reached for the required items, careful not to make any too-sudden movements… into the basket went the eggs… free range, of course… best back bacon followed, then the sausages… almost done… I reached for the baked beans… suddenly, alarm! … the tin slipped from my hands and clattered to the floor… immediate response from the minders… no more time for whispers… full blown screams into the ends of the sleeves… ‘…Can Down! Can Down! we have a Can Down in aisle six’… in a blur, the two closest bodyguards swept me up and out of harm’s way… through the checkout… a swift flash of a credit card… into the limo… and off in a cloud of wheel-spitting dust… speed records broken on the way back… and safely into the kitchen… mission accomplished… job done… just another hum-ho day in the life of an over-imaginative crime-thriller quill-scraper… see yeez later, I’ve got a full breakfast to demolish…


Filed under Blether, Scribbling & Stuff

…if yer wee book’s going out to meet people, make sure yeez dress it up nicely… #TBSU…

…when this ol’ Jurassic was growing up in Docklands Govan in Glasgow about a hundred years ago, money was a scarcer commodity than honest politicians… I recall often the phrase, ‘…there’s no shame in being poor, but there’s no excuse for not being clean…’ …for example, at kids’ birthday parties in the neighbourhood (and at least fifty squealing offspring were always present) the faces started off at least shiny and well scrubbed… some tiny lads even sported neckties… that lasted about fourteen nano-seconds into the party… and the wee lassies inevitably had ribbons in their hair, which remained there only marginally longer than the neckties on the boys… but the thing was, yer Mammy ensured that yeez went to the party looking yer best… now that I’m regularly sending my own little literary babies into the Big Scary WURLD of the internet, I’m minded to do the same with them… dress them up as nicely as I can… I’m talking about cover page WURK here… in the next week or so, my current objective is to publish ‘Self-Publishing Steps To Successful Sales’… my account of how this old f*rt has managed to have books generate 75,000+ sales/downloads on the ePublishing merry-go-round… so far, great encouragement for this next wee masterpiece has been forthcoming from lots of yeez Lads and Lassies of Blog Land… it won’t pretend to be an experts’ guide to all things eBook, but merely demonstrate that with less than zero computer nous, yeez can be successful on the Amazon Kindle gig… the fun part for the last few days has been in designing the cover page… I don’t want yeez talking about my wee baby and making comments that I don’t send it out to meet yeez in its best bib and tucker… watch this space… see yeez later… LUV YEEZ


Filed under Blether, Scribbling & Stuff

Review: “Vengeance Wears Black” by Seumas Gallacher

… my dear friend, Author Christoph Fischer, obviously a masochistic glutton for punishment has seen fit to review a second of my crime thrillers, VENGEANCE WEARS BLACK, and will even publish an interview with yours truly later this week… I can assure you that no reviewers were harmed during the making of this post !


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“Vengeance Wears Black” by Seumas Gallacher is a gripping thriller set in the world of a private security firm that investigates sinister international mobsters.
Beginning with a rather grim chapter involving human trafficking from Eastern Europe to Britain the book then turns its focus on London. Members of said security only narrowly escape a bomb blast that seems part of a international gang warfare.
Jack Calder and his former SAS colleagues investigate and team up with officials to sort out the mess that spans from Hong Kong and South China to Eastern Europe and the UK.
Gallacher has spun a complex plot that reflects how one must imagine the underworld functioning. The investigation moves at a realistic pace but never loses suspense and intrigue. The characters are also gratefully written without the OTT attributes that many thrillers like to give their heroes. Calder and his partners are almost regular people…

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…which face do yeez wear in the mornings?.. the nasty or the nice?… # TBSU…

…I often wonder if there’s a ‘Grumpy Pill’ sum’where that people take when they fall out of bed in the morning… now, I’m not saying that this ol’ Jurassic’s the Smiler of the Week each morning either, but by and large, I think I’m fairly mellow in my approach to most days… but recently I’ve observed a clutch of candidates for A*sshole of the Month… my early morning writing routine is quite constant… the lounge lobby of the Jumeirah at Etihad Towers Hotel in Abu Dhabi gives me access to my croissants and coffee… and I tap away at the laptop for an hour or two… as with airports, hotel lounges are fabulous ‘people-watching’ places… the serving staff, an array mostly of lovely young ladies from various nationalities, look after their guests splendidly… everybody is greeted with genuine smiles and waiting time is non-existent… should make all the guests happy, right?… wrong!… time after time, my sense of proper manners gets rude shock after rude shock… brusque, abrupt, downright bluudy rude people bark at the staff… to be answered with, guess what?… further smiles, that’s what… I would like to think it’s not because the serving staff have seen and heard so much of that kind of rudeness that they’ve become inured to it… no, what it amounts to is that these young ladies have more politeness in their little fingers than the ‘must-have-clambered-out-of-bed-on-the-wrong-side-again’ brigade… but, there’s good in everything, as my Mama used to tell me… for me, it makes me want to ensure that my own behaviour is on the positive side… for which my reward is tons more of these great smiles… I thoroughly believe we each have a choice when we wake up as to how we approach the day… which face do yeez wear in the mornings?… the nasty or the nice?… I’ll be watching yeez… see yeez later… LUV YEEZ


Filed under Blether, Scribbling & Stuff