Monthly Archives: May 2014

…as Abu Dhabi MacYoda, enter now I must… #TBSU…

… I s’pose it was gonna always be difficult to keep it under wraps… my dear pal Eric Gates, he of the Martial Arts skills (so don’t p*ss him off, whatever yeez do), learned that the next Star Wars movie is to be filmed right here in sunny Abu Dhabi… the resourceful Master Gates, used some of his ‘persuasive’ techniques, I have no doubt, to land me the amended role of Abu Dhabi MacYoda… the first promotional photographs of which now revealed can be… one with the ‘normal’ light sabre… the second with the MacSabre in tartan (of course, be it must)…here in all my majesty, I am… Sean Connery, yer heart out eat…. voila: …later, yeez see, I will…

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Abu Dhabi Yoda

 

 

.Abu Dhabi Yoda with the Force

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…there is no price tag on courage… Tiananmen Square remembered…#TBSU…

Tank man

…the unnamed man who stood in front of the tanks on June 4th, 1989 in Tiananmen Square, Beijing, armed with nothing but a couple of plastic bags… his fate is unknown…

…this ol’ Jurassic has absolutely no desire to get enmeshed in politics of any colour… controversy and complexity have attended much of my activities over the years in business and in underdeveloped societies, where it’s almost impossible not to rail against the injustices and impoverishment of people who find it difficult to fight and voice for themselves… none of that is allowed to invade this blog... a decision I made from the outset when determining the style and ethos of what I scribble here… so, this particular post is NOT intended as a statement of anything other than to wonder at the courage shown by a mass of students 25 years ago on June 4th, 1989 in Tiananmen Square in Beijing, the capital of China… and hopefully as some sort of memorial piece for those souls who perished that day… I’m writing this now exactly two weeks before the 25th anniversary of the massacre, and will Re-Tweet it daily until then… I was living in Hong Kong and married at the time to a Chinese girl, whose own parents had fled to the then-British-held conclave to escape the notorious ‘clearances’ in Shanghai many years before in 1949, in which many of the middle class population just ‘disappeared’… we watched, horrified, on live television the scenes unfold as the students took on the might of the army tanks and troops… and I witnessed my wife’s terror as she fell apart watching what she considered a rerun of the Shanghai events… I wrote a poem that night, dashed down in one shot, which the next day I sent to the local English-language newspaper, The South China Morning Post… they ran it with a black border around it… I post it here without any further comment… LUV YEEZ!

 

TO THE FLOWERS OF TIANANMEN SQUARE

The chill of death came swiftly

To the flowers of youth that morn

But the seed will last forever

From the slaughter, hope is born.

 

A world watched in horror

As their lifeblood flowed that day

The memories of courage

Will never fade away.

 

Soldiers, tanks and bullets

Cannot eclipse their roles

They may burn the students’ bodies

But they cannot destroy their souls.

 

Their voices now are silent

But will echo from the grave

To taunt at Man’s own madness

For those whom power crave.

 

In tears of grief and sorrow

For now, we share the pain

But please, let us remember,

‘Let them not have died in vain’.

 

SEUMAS GALLACHER

Hongkong

June, 1989

 

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25 Ways to Help Self-Published Authors

Re-blogged from The Storyreading Ape

25 Ways to Help Self-Published Authors.

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…Authors, beware the shiny Mirror, Mirror on the Wall Syndrome… #TBSU…

…there’s only ever been two people that I really would like to have been rather than myself… the first was Sir Winston Leonard Spencer Churchill, my first and everlasting lifelong hero… that switch of character desire vanished when the great man died in 1965, when I was in my teens… it’s not much fun being a dead bloke… the other wannabe-sumb’dy-else phase happened when my other hero arrived on the scene… the comedic God, Billy Connolly… granted, for the initial period of doting on his humour I was more or less constantly in the addictive grasp of chronic Booze-ism…. (I’ve long-since abandoned the pursuit of a premature termination by keeping a wary distance from the electric soup and its various liquid cousins, but that’s a story for another day)… I’m now content to let Master Connolly purvey his craft without any need for me to switch places with him… so the full circle has been taken, and for good or otherwise, I’m left with….me… the thought pleases me… but here’s why I’m trundling on about this today… I’ve picked up on several of yeez Lads and Lassies of Blog Land out there who profess an objective of writing like sumb’dy else… it’s astonishing how these kinda topics come in herds… one week, it’s stuff lamenting a paucity of sales figures… the next it’s competing in polls for this, that, and the other scribblers competitions… this wee while back, it’s been all about wannabe write-alikes to that wee Rowling lassie, or the Jimmy Patterson fella, or some such other ‘famous’ quill-scraper… now, to have the desire to be great novelists is terrific… but not as a surrogate for sumb’dy else… my tuppence worth is this… stop it right now!…cut it out!…  desist!… be yourselves!... write yer own stuff, and if it’s good enuff, the WURLD will beat it’s path to yer door (or not… it is a fickle planet)… daft Scots Author’s mild rant over… get back about yer business, folks, NUTHIN to see here… catch yeez later… LUV YEEZ!

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mirror

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…not so much a Bucket List item, more a ‘Just-Do-It-While-Yeez-Still-Can’ kinda gig… #TBSU…

…any of yeez out there over the age of say, 40, will prob’ly well understand the concept of ‘nostalgia’… about a month ago, I posted a blog piece, the sheaf of positive responses to which just blew me away… it was triggered one night when I played a Gaelic song by Runrig, called ‘An Ubhal As Airde’ (The Highest Apple)… and I’ve hardly stopped listening to it since… it conjured up the memories of my arrival in the Scottish Hebridean island of Mull exactly 50 years ago… I left the island after six life-changing years, having acquired some of the local language and some medals for singing it… the story, repeated below in the original post, speaks to that… now, here’s the thing… I rang a friend who still lives in Tobermory on the island, and proposed the crazy idea of me coming back there later this year, and being allowed to present a Learner’s Prize trophy to which I donated some money some years ago… but the real purpose would be to sing with her (her name is Janet Macdonald, nee Tandy-–she won the Gold Medal some years ago in the National Gaelic Mod festival) and another great medal winner, Joannie Kirsop (nee Mackenzie) as we did so often together in ceilidhs back then… and get the lot on video…  the song would be the one referred to above, that Runrig performs on here… see yeez later… LUV YEEZ!

 

…the original post is here :

…Authors, when yeez need a wee flame to re-ignite yer soul, try this music… #TBSU…

…this ol’ Jurassic tries to live by a credo of having only two kinds of day… ‘good’ days and ‘better’ days… and on these intervals when they are merely ‘good’ days, a wee dip into my past life fifty years ago as an apprentice banker in the glorious Isle of Mull in the Scottish Hebrides never fails to render it into a ‘better’ day… only those who’ve lived amongst a community such as those in the Highlands of Scotland will get close to understanding the ties of the heart that bind yeez forever to a place… my early years were formulated in Docklands Govan in Glasgow, also populated with some of the salt of the earth, people who usually had little in the way of tangible things to give, but offered freely of their kindness to others… but a special kinship belongs to the smaller village-style communities such as those that welcomed in a callow youth of barely 15 years… estranged from a big city family (the tale of which can wait for another day), the good people of Tobermory in Mull enveloped me with a warmth of society I’ve never encountered since…

Mull

…back in them days, I occasionally plinked away at a guitar and warbled an even more nasal version of ‘Blowing in the Wind’ thanMaster B. Dylan himself… it didn’t take long to be persuaded to learn some gaelic songs… two wunnerful lady schoolteachers were ‘donated’to me, one to teach me the gaelic, and one to drill me in the music (in the delivery of gaelic songs the meaning of the words weighs more than even the music itself)… after that I was ‘entered’ in gaelic-singing competitions locally and nationally at what the Scots Gaels refer to as‘the Mod’ (the Welsh have their equivalent in the annual Eisteddfod)… history will show I was fortunate enuff to garner a pile of prizes… but the greatest reward of all was the lifelong love instilled in me of pure Celtic music… if yeez have any romance at all in yer soul… if the Music of the Gods means anything to yeez, yeez’ll understand what I mean… and if even if yeez don’t understand it… yeez can still enjoy it, (above) …  Runrig, with ‘An Ubhal as Airde’... (‘the Highest Apple’)… go on… turn yer day into a ‘better’ day… have a listen, and enjoy… see yeez later… LUV YEEZ

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…there are times when my male Neanderthal links are so evident… #TBSU…

…I think there’s a lot more to this DNA gig than folk realise… forget for a minute the obvious traits, such as physical body formation, human genome trails, generation to generation… the continuation of family likenesses and stuff I can accept in the wink of an eye… what about the behaviour patterns passed down through the millennia?… the instinctive reactions to situations?… methinks p’raps there’s more than a tad of that also gets permeated down through the DNA, all the way from the earliest ancient civilisations (some of which, by the way, seem a lot more civilised than the current lot) up to the modern day… now, yeez may be asking yourselves, ‘how does Master Gallacher arrive at these amazing deducements?’… elementary my dear What’s On… evidence of this ol’ Jurassic’s own behaviour on occasion… case in point yesterday… from time to time, I indulge a wee bit of paper shredding… none of yer Enron-style document-disposal ploys… more like old invoices and bills, no longer required… don’t want to throw them in the garbage collection wheelies, lest sumb’dy goes in search of industrial sabotage in my litter… a while back I purchased one of these modestly-priced shredder machines built to reduce yer household paper waste to strips of confetti … thing is, the maximum recommended ‘feed’ of paper into the bit at the top where the ‘teeth’ are is six sheets of paper… of course, such suggestions fly in the face of the need to get the job done quickly… result, I try to stuff a dozen or so at a time into the mini-hopper… for the first few seconds, all is well… then the initial chewing-up process instantly gives way to a nasty, horrible, grinding noise… the bluudy thing jams… with only a quarter-depth of the pages ripped… and stuck… the rest flutters out of the top of the machine, mocking my efforts at home waste management… the sensible course of action, naturally, would be to retrieve the papers, reverse the motion, and slim down the ‘feed’… right?… not a chance!… Neanderthal Being DNA takes over… I try harder to stuff the remainder of the mess into the chewer… with even worse consequences… the machine capitulates… cursing ensues…(and it’s not pretty)… it’s a ‘man’ thing, y’see… it’ll be alright in an hour or two when I’ve picked out all the wee bits hanging inside this bluudy machine… see yeez later… LUV YEEZ!

shredder

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…Daft Old Scots Author’s ALERT! …Health Warnings can be a danger to yer Health… #TBSU…

…I don’t suppose for a nano-second that the Cavemen Cousins of Barney Rubble and Fred Flintstone had much truck with dietary consideration… a menu of dinosaur steaks with chips followed by a nice swamp-leave salad prob’ly filled the bill nicely, thanks… if chocolate had been available, the delicacy for sweets may well have been Barbecued Mars Bars… as far as can be understood, there’s no record of anything in the way of fitness trainers or nutritionists plying their trade 200,000 years or so ago… it may well be that the primary eating concern back then was not to be part of a T-Rex’s lunch… so, fast forward to the ‘Enlightened Age’ of the current millennium… I do know that many of yeez pride yourselves in looking after yer physical well-being, and I applaud that… some others may be a tad less concerned with the Slob-look/No-Slob-look choice, and I equally have no contest with that… umpteen marathons run on one spot on machines in a gymnasium are a personal choice, as are ‘pumping iron’ and pumping any other such elements … do so to yer heart’s content… you will find no argument from me… where I do have an issue is with the perpetual sequence of ‘lifestyle advice’ from the endless succession of ‘expert’ medical WURLD gurus… Health Warnings can be a danger to yer Health… well-intended they may be, but cohesive they are not… one month the message tells me eggs are bad for me… a month later sumb’dy else states that eggs are the best stuff to stuff into yer stuff… sugar, confections, fats, non-fats, carbo-bluudy-hydrates, proteins, anti-teins, glutens, exercise, non-exercise, alcohol, non-alcohol… they all have their advocates one minute, then the next, the diametrically opposite views… y’see, for more than a lot of years, I’ve eaten pretty much whatever I fancy… my epicurean tastes range from fine dining at Mcdonalds (double cheeseburger, extra large fries, tons of mayo, and a DIET coke, thanks) all the way to slumming it over truffles and mille feuille at the Dorchester Grill Room… when I ultimately take up my reservation at the Big Dining Room in the Sky, I’ll bequest my carcass to scientific medical posterity… I’m certain when they open me up they’ll find in my DNA an indication of ancestral gorging on dinosaur steaks and chips… see yeez later… LUV YEEZ!

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… how will yeez recognise me?…I’ll be wearing nothing but a fireman’s helmet, frogman’s flippers and a rose between my teeth…#TBSU…

…browsing through my Archives, and came across this wee baby, I thought yeez might like another squint at it…

… how will yeez recognise me?…I’ll be wearing nothing but a fireman’s helmet, frogman’s flippers and a rose between my teeth…#TBSU….

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…Authors, when Amazon pages pander to yer masterpieces, don’t just admire them, use them! …#TBSU…

…being a self-published scribbler begs yer attention daily… as the author, proof-reader, editor, promoter, Kindle-formatter, and chief general dogsbody for yer own WURK, it behoves yeez (dontcha LUV that WURD, ‘behoves’?) to constantly engage in doing sum’thing, however small, every day to advance yer business of writing… most of it yeez have to divine yerselves… doing Guest Posts for fellow Lads and Lassies of Blog Land’s pages… supporting other Tweeters and FaceBookies, Google+ers and LinkedIn-ers, Tumblr-ers and Stumbleupon-ers, etcetera-ers, etcetera-ers, etcetera-ers… running Amazon Kindle promo page interventions… oh, yes, and actually doing some writing (remember that stuff?) on yer latest opus or yer own blogs… but every now and then along comes a wee bonus… the programmed messages from the Great God Amazon Kindle, where they make the Recommendations of the Day… and in the finest tradition of vanity publishing, they quote yer very own wee babies as their choices of the hour… of course they do it for everybody, Mabel, but that’s not the point... the point this ol’ Jurassic has picked up is this: by giving yeez Amazon page mileage, they are also handing yeez a gift-wrapped excuse to bang that page all over yer SOSYAL NETWURKS… none of yer hide-yer-light-under-a-bushel nonsense here!… if some bloke on the street saw fit to recommend yer book to sumb’dy else, yeez would be tickled pink… so when Amazon institutionalises the recommendations, no better platform exists on the Web to shout it from the rooftops… pick that huckleberry up, cut and paste it to yer heart’s content, and let the WURLD know about it… I do it shamelessly… and here’s the other thing… my pals on here seem  to LUV it… they share it around too… and I do the same when theirs appear... to give yeez a visual, here’s what the last one looked like, and how I used it on Facebook… see yeez later,… LUV YEEZ…

 

‘…I’m certain now that Amazon.co.uk is trying to make me feel on top of the world, and yes, I know, I know, I know they send these things to all the authors, but when they list ALL FOUR of your titles, #1, #2, #3 and #4, as recommended daily deals, you don’t half feel good ! Thanks Amazon:Kindle

Self-Publishing Steps To Successful Sales
seumas gallacher

Price: £1.86

SAVAGE PAYBACK
seumas gallacher

Price: £3.18

THE VIOLIN MAN’S LEGACY
seumas gallacher

Price: £3.21

VENGEANCE WEARS BLACK
seumas gallacher

Price: £3.21

As The Crow Flies (The DI Nick Dixon Crime Series)
Damien Boyd

Price: £1.99
Learn more

cover2Savage03-1VMVWB_02

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Author Survival Resources ~ #saam14

…Cate Russell-Cole provides even more splendid pointers for all authors… :):):)

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