…Authors… the phrase, ‘that’s not my job’, is NOT part of yer lexicon…

…no matter how much research yeez employ, it’s unlikely yeez will find records of the likes of Billy Shakespeare, Enid Blyton or Chuck Dickens having to do their own artWURK, or distribution channel placement for their masterpieces… nor the copy-editing, proof-reading or bookstore signings… changed days indeed… the modern wannabe classic scribblers are obliged to have more arrows in the things-yeez-have-to-do-yerselves quiver…

bbbbbb…at the last count, I’ve managed to find an assortment of operational obligations required to get yer books out there… and this holds for whether yeez are an independent self-publishing stoic or shepherded by either/or an Agent (a what thing??) or a real-live Publisher (they do exist)… but this ol’ Jurassic is fortunate (?) in having found a person for each function, viz:

writing the bluudy thing in the first place… er, that’ll be me..

initial editing…. that’s down to, well… me again…

copy-tracking for plot holes…. I’m the one who does that…

proofreading… I’m yer Huckleberry on that one, too…

organising cover artwork…. hmmm… aye, that’s yours truly…

coordinating with eBook channels such as the Great God Amazon… myself’ll do that…

price-setting… who else, but Moi?…

SOSYAL NETWURKIN activity to ‘build yer platform’… cloning of oneself would be a plus…

marketing programming… nobody but I…

continual promotional pitching… self, again…

bookstore signings… only the Author can do it…

Guest Speaking to generate interest in yer wee literary babies… who can do it better than?…

just about anything else that impacts the entire business of being a successful quill-scraper… yer mirror shows yeez who’s best for that…


but the employment terms are terrific… I’m permitted to invent 36-hour days… indulge in constant cerebral debates with my fictional (?) characters… allowed to feast on chocolate biscuits and Diet Cokes in lieu of lunch/dinner/supper/breakfast/oh-is-it-that-time-already?… eternal nibbly picnics amongst the laptop keys… and d’yeez know what?… I’m LUVVIN IT!… emb’dy else amongst yeez Lads and Lassies of Blog Land relate?… see yeez later… LUV YEEZ!



Filed under Blether, Scribbling & Stuff

22 responses to “…Authors… the phrase, ‘that’s not my job’, is NOT part of yer lexicon…

  1. dorothymaydekok

    Just had to laugh, because you hit the nail on the head. I didn’t know what JPG meant until I had to make a book cover. Fortunately a really good friend fixed the mess I made of the first one. Now I can kinda do it myself. I edit for a living but do you think I can spot my own typos? I have another friend whom I pay a buck for every error found. And that forces me to try real hard with my own proofreading (being a struggling writer and wotnot). And marketing, I ain’t even CLOSE to that one.
    But I have to agree, I’m LUVVIN’ every moment of it. I would never dream of doing anything but write (and the other jack-of-all-trades goodies that go along with it).

    Liked by 1 person

  2. If I hire someone I can afford for those jobs, I’m the only one I can think of. I work really cheap on my own creations. :D.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Reblogged this on Jo Robinson and commented:
    Ha haaaa! Spot on Seumas – and you should see the brainstorming sessions when the employees disagree around here. 😀 😀 😀

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Yes… Indie is just like my real job… *everything is my job*.
    Wishing you a satisfying Saturday, Seumas. Hugs. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Actually, Famous Seumas, if you are the likes of Katy Price, you don’t even have to write the book – someone else does that for you. Nice life, innit.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Sheesh. An author’s work is n.e.v.e.r. done!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Me, Myself and I indeed. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  8. ..from all of me’s to all of you’s, mwaaah, m’Lady , Olga 🙂


  9. I really wanted to leave a comment, but it’s not my job 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  10. This is the best! If I ever manage to sell any books I’ll have to add bookkeeping and accounting to my list of jobs.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Pingback: Friday Finds: Week 31 | Avid Reader

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