Tag Archives: computer literacy. GARY BROOKES

…meet my haggis-bashing pal…Guest Blogger, Gary Brookes

We ALL have secrets, some darker and longer hidden than others…step up now my old mate GARY BROOKES, whom I first met 20 years ago in the Philippines…compared with his expertise in everything to do with the IT world and computer gadgetry and systems, I know NOTHING about that stuff…but believe it or not, Gary met me when I knew even LESS THAN NOTHING…Despite my holding several smudged photographs of blackmail quality, he insists in sharing this blog piece below…
From Gary Brookes:
Having spoken with Seumas a few days ago he casually reported that he would be speaking at a prestigious event sharing his self-publication success and social media expertise.  My mojo has been touched….

How things have changed.
For those of you experienced in the blog-world and twitter-universe you may be given cause to think that Seumas is and always was, the guru in this social galaxy or at the very least perhaps exaggerating his non-technical, even Jurassic level of computer non-literacy claims.  Perhaps you think he was being modest?  Now, having known Seumas for some time (I have been treated by that as a result, and all is fine, just as long as I don’t visualise the night he slipped over wearing his kilt), I can recall the conversation when he first started his business and needed “one of those things with letters on that you press… oh, and a winder”.  Now, my task was to help raise this fossil from the dead and explain how computers, unlike most 18th century clocks, do not require a winder, prayer, stroking or a “Glasgow Kiss” when it doesn’t do as it’s told.

I must confess, the future looked bleak – not solely because of the day he tried to connect the printer by threatening it with death by urination, but mainly because he had convinced himself that nothing could work without a winder.  This is a man who refused to travel on an ‘e-Ticket’ as he genuinely thought they were only for travel to countries beginning with an ‘E’, which explains why we have only managed to meet up when he is in London.  Like most friends, I provided the platitudes and decided to leave the country we were both residing in, so that I could manage him remotely (I successfully adopted the same strategy with my ex-Wife) and send him the occasional email, knowing full well he would struggle to even open it.
Now I must eat some humble haggis.
This is my own first ever blog entry and I find myself doing it to keep up with my former pupil, in fact I have to email this blurb to him in order for him to post it onto his cyber pals.  Let’s ensure we are all clear on this – I am not the least bit surprised by his success from an author perspective, those of us that know Seumas suspected there were a few best-sellers in that capacious, albeit slightly weird intellect, but in equal measure those who believed in his writing ability also believed that he would have to hire a coterie of PA’s to do the typing from his scribbled notes.
It with equal surprise and admiration that I read his work from every corner of the social universe and get buzzed, pinged and emailed from the man at regular intervals.  It has served me notice that if he can do it, there is hope for even the most technically challenged imbeciles out there.  Well done that man, now hurry up and write that third novel so the rest of us can enjoy the work and I can have the added bonus of visualising your endless search for the winder (but not wearing a kilt).


Filed under Blether, Scribbling & Stuff